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did you change your name?

Just been thinking a bit lately about the old get-married-change-your-last-name trick that us girls have to navigate.  If you’re a girl, and you’re married, did you change your name?  And if you’re a dude and you’re married, did your lady change hers?  And if not, what happened?  I’d love to know.

I didn’t take Mr. Lovely’s last name.  I did sign the papers that make it a possibility one day, rather than closing the matter off completely.  But I don’t know — something about changing my last name didn’t quite feel right.  It didn’t have anything whatsoever to do with my most adorable husband.  It wasn’t even some lofty feminist statement.  When you boil it down, for me, it’s this:  I’ve been Chelsea Costa for 30 years, and I like it.  I like my name, and I like that my initials are C.C.  I like how it feels to write and how it looks (not to mention that professionally, my name is already my brand).  I never correct anyone if I’m called by my husband’s last name; it doesn’t bother me at all.  It’s just that nowadays, I’m not sure that there’s a real reason for me to change it.

So I’m kind of curious what everyone else thinks!  It’s an interesting concept, no?  Does anyone have a husband who changed his name to yours?  How about hyphenates?  Let’s talk about it.

And by the way, remember that pretty photo from the top of the post?  Here’s what happened right before it.  Bahaha.  xoxo

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26 thoughts on “did you change your name?

  1. i am in the process of the name change, but i’m being pretty lazy about it. so far i changed my name at the bank and on our life insurance (only bc the insurance company offered)…the social security office and DMV seem daunting. plus i have to take time off to do it! i thought about keeping my name, but it’s important to me that when we have kids we all have the same last name. but maybe if i had a brand or business i would reconsider!

  2. I just wanted to write about my cousin, her husband & their unusual take on this topic. When they married, both took on each others name & hyphenated both surnames. So both he & her, along with the children have the hyphenated names. Now I’m not really sure how I feel about this, but her reasoning was to keep her maiden name in existence.
    My grandfather changed his rather ethnic surname to a more user friendly version about the time of WWII. He only had one son who then had two daughters(my cousins), so really when you think about it the surname she is keeping isn’t really the family name at all.
    I think its just a personal thing, everyone has differing views & each person should be respected for the choice they eventually make. I myself was married(changed my name), separated (changed it back), am now in the process of a divorce & am happily engaged to marry my sweetheart in September.
    P.S. I do plan to change my name again. 😀

  3. I did change my name to my husband’s, but I didn’t like my maiden name. We’ve been married now for 16 years and have two kids. It seems to make things so much easier and apparent that we are a family (not that different last names makes you less of a family, but you definitely have to answer many more questions with kids).
    With all the divorce and blended families, it seems like having the same last names makes it obvious.

  4. Taking his name ment having the same surname as my children. And it ment my dialect-pronounciation of the ‘G'(the first letter of my maidenname) wasn’t prone anymore, his (= now our) name startes with a ‘H’ ;). Not the main reason, but nice in the process!

  5. I’m not getting married any time soon, but I love my last name and would never change it. My parents named each of there kids with a different last name ever though we all have the same mother and father. they just did it for the fun of it and they thought that theirs were too boring. It has never been a problem and has always made me feel so unique.

  6. I just got married last October…I’m a doctor and I still took my husband’s last name. I like the idea of being a family with the same name, especially when we have children, and silly me I actually like when people at the hospital realize we’re married. It somehow brings me closer to him and I really enjoy that. I do miss my maiden name but I don’t feel like my identity has been lost…even within the medical and research world, I’m still the same person and proud of this new little change.

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